RANDOM-ISM.

krayon.

krayon's gone for a week. so i guess no late nights, no file sharing, no talking about books and foreign films and kubriks for a while. sometimes i wonder about stuff but yeah, i guess kin is right, i just think too much.


sometimes it seems so easy to dismiss a subject, or drop a conversation and try to talk about something else. but then, the human mind is designed as such that we keep on going back and think about what we initially left hanging. sometimes, emotions are so strong we tend to react unnecessarily, but sometimes emotions so strong but heart is as hard as stone, we feel nothing. i'm not sure if i am feeling anything at all. i think i've numbed myself.


rather weird how i can laugh and five minutes later i stare into space and cry. and no, no dust caught in my eye.


and rather weird how i dread so much going to school, and at the same time when it's over, i dread going home.


trying to keep myself intact but the mind is breaking down, the heart is already in pieces.


ARGH I AM SO DRAMA. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME?!


maybe a song will enlighten you?


You tried so hard to be someone

That you forget who you are

You tried to fill some emptiness

Till all you had spilled over


Now everything's so far away

That you don't know

Where you are

You are


When all that you wanted

And all that you have

Don't seem so much

For you to hold on to

For you to hold on to

For you to belong to


When it's hard to be yourself

It's not to be someone else

Still everything's so far away

That you forget where you are

You are


When all that you wanted

And all that you have

Don't seem so much

For you to hold on to

For you to hold on to




i'm needing a shrink. seriously.

posted by Myz @ 12:24 PM